Couple's Sex Toy: Reinvent Your Valentine's Day

"My love, our bodies should remember / All the nights we spent together."
Louis Aragon , There is no such thing as happy love (sung by Ferré)

Valentine's Day is approaching with its procession of red roses, heart-shaped chocolates and predictable candlelit dinners, but what if this year you chose another path , a path that leads to true intimacy , the kind that reinvents itself, whispers, and is discovered in the hollow of the sheets and the short breaths of shared nights?

Giving a sex toy on Valentine's Day is not simply adding an object to your collection, it's opening a door, the door of curiosity , of play , of renewed complicity , it's saying to the other: I want to explore us differently, I want our desire to remain alive, to transform, to surprise.

In 1969 , Serge Gainsbourg whispered words to Jane Birkin that were both scandalous and enchanting. Thanks to the sexual revolution , people finally dared to say that pleasure wasn't shameful, that it could be shared, invented, and celebrated. Today, we are the heirs to that freedom, the freedom that refuses to let desire slumber under the weight of routine or convention.

Whether you have been together for six months or fifteen years, whether you are a heterosexual, queer, trans, polyamorous couple or simply outside the box, a sex toy can become the ritual that makes the heart beat differently, a silent language, a promise kept: that of never taking shared pleasure for granted.

At 1969, we believe that love thrives on attention, presence, and sometimes a little technological boost to awaken the senses. Here's why and how a sex toy can transform your Valentine's Day into an intimate and unforgettable celebration .

Why give a sex toy as a Valentine's Day gift?

Because love reinvents itself

The beginnings are electric: every caress is a discovery, every kiss a virgin territory, then time passes and what was fire becomes gentleness, sometimes routine . This is not inevitable, it is an invitation, an invitation to reinvent your intimate rituals like changing records on a vinyl turntable, to rediscover the thrill of the first groove.

A sex toy offers an opportunity to break away from the norm , to explore new play, a novel sensation, a different way of touching oneself. It's not about replacing what already exists, but enriching it, saying: our desire deserves to be nurtured, stimulated, and cultivated like a rare plant that requires attention.

Valentine's Day then becomes the perfect pretext to place this object between the two of you, like a sweet proposal : what if we tried, what if we let ourselves be surprised by what our bodies can still discover together?

Because it's an intimate conversation

There are desires we keep to ourselves, curiosities we don't dare express, fantasies that remain hidden in the shadows out of modesty, fear of judgment, or simply a lack of words. Anaïs Nin wrote in her diary: "We do not grow absolutely, chronologically. We grow sometimes in one dimension, and not in another; unevenly." (The Diary of Anaïs Nin). Desire, too, grows unevenly, unpredictably, sometimes silently.

Giving a sex toy as a gift opens up a dialogue without having to say everything; it offers a neutral playing field where desires can be expressed without pressure. The sex toy becomes a mediator: it speaks for you, suggests for you, explores for you, and often, it's by discovering it together that you start talking, saying what you like, what intrigues you, what you'd like to try.

Complicity is woven in these exchanges, whispered in the intimacy of a bedroom or slipped in between two nervous laughs, like a confidence shared in the twilight of a late evening.

Because shared enjoyment strengthens the bond

Science confirms it: sharing sexual experiences releases oxytocin , the hormone nicknamed the "bonding hormone," but beyond neurotransmitters, there's something simpler, more visceral. Enjoying sex together creates a shared memory, an imprint that remains etched in the body as much as in the mind.

A sex toy for couples is a pleasure that flows like an electric current, a vibration that runs through both bodies, a rhythm that you discover together. It's the experience of being in sync, of looking into each other's eyes as the pleasure builds, of laughing when it doesn't work right away, of starting again until it becomes second nature, like a choreography you learn together, without a written score.

These moments are etched into sensory memory , they become your secret rituals, your intimate codes, your warm memories, and that is exactly what love needs to last: unique moments , repeated, renewed, always a little different.

Because Valentine's Day can be more than just a cliché

Roses, chocolates, gift cards, year after year, the same script that writes itself. But what if you wrote your own this time, with your own words, your own gestures, your own definition of what it means to celebrate love?

Valentine's Day, in its 1969 version, isn't about celebrating the ideal couple as portrayed in women's magazines or Hollywood films; it's about celebrating your relationship, what makes you unique, what truly excites you. It's the legacy of May '68, which whispered " let's enjoy ourselves without restraint ," it's the freedom to reject injunctions, norms, and prefabricated expectations.

Giving a sex toy as a gift is a way of saying: our love doesn't fit into neat categories, our intimacy deserves better than a standardized dinner, our desire is worth the time, attention, and imagination we dedicate to it. It's choosing authenticity over conformity, excitement over routine, exploration over mechanical repetition.

Our Valentine's Day selection: 4 worlds of shared pleasure

Rather than an exhaustive list of products resembling an IKEA catalog of eroticism, we've imagined four sensory territories , four ways to reconnect, to surprise, to flow pleasure between your bodies. Choose according to your desires, your curiosities, your circumstances; there are no wrong choices, only the ones that resonate with you.

1. Couple's vibrator: a vibration that circulates between you

Imagine: you are entwined, skin to skin, and something vibrates between you, not an external object that would intrude on your intimacy, but an extension of your gestures, an amplified caress that creates a current flowing through both bodies.

The couple's vibrator nestles where your anatomies meet; it can be worn during penetration, adding continuous clitoral stimulation, transforming each movement into a double sensation, or it can be used in foreplay, held by one, felt by the other, creating a gentle power game where pleasure circulates, is given, and shared like a silent conversation.

What it offers:

• Simultaneous stimulation of the clitoris and G-spot during penetration
• Vibrations also felt by the penetrating partner, creating a truly shared experience.
• The ability to vary the angles , pressures , and rhythms according to your moods and discoveries.
• A constant reminder that pleasure is never solitary , even in the most intimate union.

This sex toy is particularly suitable for couples practicing penis-vulva penetration , but also for those who use a strap-on dildo, because vibration then becomes a universal language of pleasure, independent of anatomies.

Discover our selection of vibrators for couples

2. Vibrating Egg & Remote Control: The Surprise Game

What if pleasure began long before the bedroom, if anticipation itself became the main erotic act ? The discreet and elegant vibrating egg slips inside or is worn against the clitoris, and is controlled remotely via a remote control or an app that transforms your smartphone into a pleasure instrument .

Your partner becomes the conductor of your sensations , even from just a few meters away, and suddenly everyday life is tinged with latent eroticism . Imagine the scene: you're having dinner at a restaurant , seemingly demure, the conversation flowing smoothly over conventional topics, but under the table, your partner triggers an unexpected vibration, and you must keep your composure, maintain your smile, as the waves of pleasure rise inexorably.

It is a consensual power game , a shared secret that electrifies the ordinary, that transforms the car journey home into an endless prelude where the waiting itself becomes erotic, almost unbearable.

What it offers:

• A game of power and consensual control that awakens the dynamics of desire
• The possibility of being stimulated in public (always discreetly) for those who enjoy the thrill of secrecy
• Anticipation that intensifies desire long before the act itself, like a long musical prelude.
• Surprise is a central erotic element, because one no longer controls when or how pleasure arrives.

Perfect for all couples looking for spice, the unexpected, a game that goes beyond the bedroom walls and infects the rest of their lives, like a musical note that lingers long after the piece has ended.

Explore our collection of vibrating eggs

3. Vibrating cock ring: amplified pleasure, prolonged duration

There are objects that seem innocuous at first glance, almost minimalist, yet radically transform the experience. The cock ring belongs to this category: a silicone circle that is placed at the base of the penis or a dildo (in the case of a vibrating ring), and that changes everything.

First, it prolongs the erection by restricting blood flow, creating a feeling of increased fullness and firmness. Then, if you've opted for a vibrating ring, it vibrates, and this vibration is transmitted with every movement, every back-and-forth motion, stimulating the clitoris or perineum depending on the configuration. Pleasure ceases to be linear; it becomes circular, a loop where each sensation leads to another.

What's beautiful about the vibrating ring is that it doesn't try to be the star; it almost fades into the background, yet its presence is felt everywhere, like a basso continuo in a jazz piece that doesn't steal the show but sets the rhythm for everything else. It reminds us that sometimes, it's the most subtle details that create the most intense experiences.

What it offers:

• Clitoral stimulation during penetration , without having to change position or add a hand to the equation
• A longer-lasting erection , allowing pleasure to be stretched out over time rather than rushing towards orgasm.
• Vibrations felt by both partners, creating a sensation of sensory synchronization
• Its ease of use makes it accessible even for those who are just discovering the world of sex toys.

Ideal for couples who want to add a layer of sensation without disrupting their habits , just enriching them, deepening them, making them last a little longer, like stretching out a song you love so it doesn't end too quickly.

Discover our selection of cock rings

4. Harness - strap-on dildos: for couples who are reinventing penetration

There are couples who do not just want to add something to their sexuality, but to reinvent it from within, to explore what happens when penetration no longer depends on an erection , when power flows differently between bodies, when one can choose the shape, size, and texture of what penetrates us or the other.

Strap-ons and harnesses are not mere accessories; they are gateways to other erotic fantasies , other sensations, other ways of experiencing desire, power, and vulnerability. Whether you are two women, two men, a heterosexual couple who have reversed roles, or a queer couple who defy categorization, these products create endless possibilities.

In the 1970s , lesbian feminists like Joan Nestle (founder of the Lesbian Herstory Archives ) were already documenting how female couples were reinventing penetration and gender roles : desire between women didn't have to mimic heterosexuality, penetration wasn't reserved for bodies with penises, and butch/femme roles weren't imitations but entirely original creations. Today, these explorations continue in your bedrooms, your role-playing, and your nights when you become exactly who you want to be.

Between women – people with vulvas: penetration, power, fluidity

For lesbian, sapphic couples or couples between people with vulvas, the strap-on is much more than a substitute, it is an object of erotic power that allows one to embody an active, dominant energy, or simply another way of loving.

Wearing a harness means feeling the weight of the dildo against your pubis, anticipating the pleasure you are going to give, taking control in a way that has nothing to do with masculinity but everything to do with your own desire to give, to penetrate, to make someone orgasm.

Being penetrated by a woman or a person with a vulva using a strap-on is a radically different experience: she looks you in the eyes, she adjusts her movements to your reactions, she is fully present for your pleasure.

Possible configurations:

• Butch/fem : one embodies a powerful feminine masculinity, the other lets herself be taken in.
• Switch : you alternate roles as you wish.
• Dual stimulation strap-on : with an internal dildo for the woman wearing the harness
• Strapless strap-on : held in place by vaginal contraction, without a harness, skin to skin

Pegging: when heterosexual couples reverse roles

Pegging (sodomy practiced by a woman on her male partner or person with a penis) is an exploration increasingly embraced by heterosexual couples who reject rigid gendered scripts.

For the man or person with a penis who receives it, it's about discovering the prostate (the P-spot, equivalent to the G-spot), embracing a new vulnerability, and letting go of traditional notions of masculinity. Prostatic orgasms are described as more intense, longer, and more "full body."

For the woman or person with a vulva who is the one penetrating, it embodies an unusual erotic power , controlling the rhythm, seeing their partner surrender. It is also a profoundly egalitarian act: everyone now knows what it feels like to penetrate AND to be penetrated.

Penetration without an erection: freedom for all people with penises

For any person with a penis (cis man, trans man, non-binary person, it doesn't matter), the strap-on offers radical freedom : penetration without the need for an erection, without depending on performance, without stress.

Whether due to stress, fatigue, medication, gender dysphoria, or simply the desire to explore differently, the harness allows for maintaining an active penetrative sex life without physiological constraints.

The possibilities:

• Vaginal or anal penetration of your partner (woman, man, non-binary person) with the dildo of your choice
• Double penetration : wear a harness and use your own penis (erect or flaccid) to penetrate two orifices simultaneously, creating a sensation of extreme "fullness".
• Choose the shape/size : realistic, colorful, textured, or curved dildo for G-spot/prostate stimulation, depending on your mood.
• Alternate roles : today you enter with the harness, tomorrow you're the one being penetrated

It is also valuable for trans men or transmasculine people who wish to penetrate with a phallus of their choosing, that resembles them, that embodies their masculinity.

How to give a sex toy as a Valentine's Day gift (without it being awkward)

Giving a sex toy as a gift, even in a long-term relationship, can cause a little apprehension: what if my partner thinks I'm criticizing our sex life, what if it comes across as a veiled reproach, what if it's too direct, not romantic enough? Rest assured, it's all in how you present the gift, in the intention behind it, in the words you use to accompany it.

Create the context before revealing the gift

Don't pull out your sex toy as a completely unplanned surprise between course and dessert; prepare the ground beforehand, create an atmosphere conducive to intimacy and curiosity. Start with a candlelit dinner if you enjoy revisited classics, or a Netflix night in your pajamas if that's more your style. The important thing isn't the setting, but the mindset: relaxed, complicit, and open.

You can subtly introduce the topic into the conversation, mention an article you've read, ask your partner what they think about sex toys in general—test the waters without being pushy. Some couples even prefer to discuss it explicitly beforehand: "I'd like us to try something new for Valentine's Day, would you be interested?" This openness can be incredibly sexy, as it shows that you take each other's desires seriously, that you don't want to impose anything but rather share everything.

Accompany your gift with a message that sets the intention

A sex toy given without context can be misinterpreted, but a sex toy accompanied by a few sincere words becomes an erotic declaration of love. Slip a little note into the packaging, something simple and genuine that explains your gesture, for example:

"I wanted us to rediscover each other, for our enjoyment to remain as vibrant and curious as ever. This gift is an invitation: to play, to explore, to surprise each other. Without pressure, just for the pleasure of seeing where it leads us."

Or, if you're feeling more poetic, quote Marguerite Duras, who wrote in The Lover : "Very quickly in my life it was too late." And add: "We still have time. Time to try everything, to feel everything, to experience everything together."

Writing on paper has something precious, something solemn about it; it shows that you took the time to choose your words, that this gift is not a joke but a real offer of renewed intimacy.

Suggest that we explore it together, without rushing.

Once the gift is unwrapped, don't rush to the bedroom as if you had a schedule to follow; let the object rest between you, observe it together, read the instructions if necessary (yes, even sex toys have instructions, and it's often very funny), talk about what you imagine doing with it, what intrigues you, what excites you about trying it.

You can even decide not to use it that very evening, letting the anticipation build for a few days, transforming the wait into an erotic prelude. Send each other messages during the day: "I've been thinking about our new toy all morning ; I can't wait to try it this weekend ." Shared anticipation intensifies desire and transforms the object into a promise.

If your partner seems hesitant, don't force anything.

Not all bodies are ready at the same time, not all curiosities awaken at the same pace, and that's perfectly normal. If your partner seems hesitant about sex toys, don't take it as a personal rejection; consider instead that the time may not be right yet, that the idea needs time to develop.

Simply suggest putting the item in a drawer, accessible but not imposed, and let time do its work. Often, it's the other person who will come back to you a few weeks later saying: actually, I'd like us to try it , because the idea will have taken root, quietly, without pressure.

Desire cannot be commanded, it must be tamed, and sometimes offering a sex toy is like planting a seed whose fruits we will see much later, when we least expect them, and that's perfectly fine.

This Valentine's Day, treat yourself to the pleasure of rediscovering yourself.

Valentine's Day doesn't have to be a commercial and conventional holiday; it can become an opportunity to celebrate what truly unites you: shared desire, intimate complicity, the will to nurture your bond rather than letting it fade under the weight of habit and the passing years.

A sex toy is never just an object, it is a deliberate intention, that of saying to the other: you matter to me, our pleasure matters to me, what we build together deserves that we devote time, attention, imagination, even when routine would have us believe that everything is already decided.

In 1969, Woodstock celebrated free love and the possibility of reinventing the rules; May '68 had already proclaimed that pleasure should never be hindered; Serge and Jane scandalized all of France by moaning in a recording studio. Today, we are the heirs of that freedom, the kind that refuses to let desire wither like cut roses.

So this year, treat yourselves to something other than flowers that won't last a week, treat yourselves to a night you'll still remember in ten years, give yourselves the opportunity to rediscover each other, to laugh together at an incomprehensible instruction manual, to shiver together with new sensations, to enjoy each other while looking into each other's eyes.

Give yourself love in its most vibrant form: curious, bold, ever-renewed, refusing resignation, embracing exploration as a given.

Discover our Valentine's Day selection and let yourselves be inspired by what your bodies can still discover together.

FAQ: Your questions about sex toys for couples for Valentine's Day